The JFK Assassination

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The JFK Assassination

Postby Walt » Fri Nov 22, 2013 10:58 am

Today is the 50th anniversary of President John F. Kennedy being blown away in Dallas. But enough seriousness, we here on the Lucky Puppy laugh at EVERYTHING. :bdancing: :bdancing:

Q: Why isn't President Obama at the Memorial Service in Dallas?
A: There might still be someone on the Grassy Knoll. #JFK50Years

My favorite sexual position is the JFK.
I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car.


Q: What did John and Robert say to Teddy when he died and went to Heaven?
A: “Where are the bullet holes?”

I reckon JFK was the only US president to ever show some brains.

Aside from that Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?
Aside from that Mrs. Kennedy, how did you like Dallas?

What's the difference between Life and JFK?
You only get one shot at Life.


"Do you remember what you were doing when JFK was killed?" I asked my Granddad.
"Reloading. But don't tell Grandma".

Why wouldn't JFK make a good boxer?
The guy can't even take one shot to the head.


Where was JFK when he was assassinated??
All over his wife.

What do President Obama and President Kennedy have in common?
Nothing.....yet.


Why is the "JFK" cocktail so popular?
Three shots and you're right out of your skull.

My teacher asked me if I knew how JFK died.
I said, "That's a no brainer."


What do they call road kill in Dallas?
"Mr. President."

JFK and Bobby walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What'll it be?"
JFK says, "Give us a couple of shooters." #JFK50Years


A week before Lincoln was shot he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot he was in Marilyn Monroe.

How did Jackie Kennedy learn about politics?
By picking her husband's brain.


Why doesn't a JFK Pez Dispenser work?
There's no head.

What does the School Book Depository in Dallas and the Clock Tower in Austin have in common?
Positive proof of what one well trained, highly motivated Marine can do with his weapon.
(Google it youngster)


What was playing on the radio in JFK's limo?
I don't know but the hits kept coming.
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Re: The JFK Assassination

Postby Walt » Fri Nov 22, 2013 12:00 pm

EVERYBODY SING!!!!

Twelve days of JFK

On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
A lone nut by the name of Lee

On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
2 Mafia thugs
and a lone nut by the name of Lee

On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
3 federal agents
2 Mafia thugs
and a lone nut by the name of Lee

On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
4 Cuban hitmen
3 federal agents
2 Mafia thugs
and a lone nut by the name of Lee

On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
The Dallas P.D.
4 Cuban hitmen
3 federal agents
2 Mafia thugs
and a lone nut by the name of Lee
:
:
:
:
On November 22nd, who killed Kennedy?
12 space invaders
11 ninja masters
10 Nazi soldiers
9 Postal workers
8 right wing loonies
7 corporate interests
6 Russian snipers
the Dallas P.D.
4 Cuban hitmen
3 federal agents
2 Mafia thugs
and a lone nut by the name of Lee
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