Thanksgiving

[Walt]

There was a family that had a parrot that was always embarrassing them by cussing and other stuff like that.

So one day the boy took the parrot and stuck him in the freezer.Two hours later the squawking stopped.

The kid checked the freezer and the parrot said, "Okay I'll stop cussing, but I have one question".

The boy said, "What"?

The Parrot asks, "What did the turkey do"???

[Walt]

A son brings his lovely fiancee home for Thanksgiving. It's the first time she's meeting his parents and she's very nervous. Everything is going fine until she lets out a loud fart at the table. Her future father-in-law look down at the family dog laying on the floor between them and says, "RUSTY!"

The girl is relieved to see Dad covering for her faux pas. A minute doesn't pass and she farts again. "RUSTY!", Dad yells, "OUT!"

But the dog doesn't budge.

When the girl farts a third time Dad yells, "For Christ sake Rusty. Get the hell out of there before she shits on you."

[Walt]

[Walt]

Popcorn Stuffing is the ultimate in out-of-the-ordinary stuffing recipes. It's a sure conversation-starter as the main ingredient for dressing our turkey for the holiday.

Serves: 6
What You'll Need:
1 whole turkey, (12 to 14 pounds), fresh or frozen, thawed
6 cups crumbled cornbread or corn muffins (see Notes)
3 cups unpopped popcorn (see Notes)
1 medium-sized onion, finely chopped
1 3/4 cups chicken broth
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted
2 eggs
1 1/2 teaspoons dried rubbed sage

What To Do:

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Coat an 8-inch square baking dish with cooking spray.

In a large bowl, combine all ingredients; mix well. Spoon into turkey. Don't forget to stuff the neck cavity.

Cover turkey loosely with heavy duty foil.

Roast 1 hour. Remove foil. Roast 2 to 2 1/2 hours longer or until internal temperature reaches 165°F (175°F in thigh), basting occasionally with pan juices. Turkey from oven. Let stand 20 minutes. Transfer to platter or carving board to slice. Reserve pan juices to make gravy or to serve with turkey.

Notes

Ready-made cornbread or muffins can be found in the bakery section of your supermarket, or you can start from scratch and use your favorite cornbread recipe.


If you do try this stuffing for "the big day," send me an email or go to my blog and let me know how everyone enjoyed it! My team and I are always happy to hear from you!

[Walt]

Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims

Q: What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
A: "If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!"

Q: Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
A: The outside.

If I was a turkey, I’d be doing everything I could to taste terrible right now.

A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough.
She asked the stock boy "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied "No they're dead."

[Walt]

Air National Guard:
Due to a BRAC closure the Chicken was forced to cross the road. The Chicken is authorized full Per Deum and Travel Expenses while crossing the road. Upon crossing, the Chicken will be assigned to the Turkey Wing and assist them with preparations for their upcoming Operation Thanksgiving deployment.